Customer Feedback

April 10th, 2009

This month, my local branch of Barclays placed a ‘customer feedback’ book on the shelf beside the queue. Whilst standing in line this morning, I glanced through them for the first time. Within seconds, I was hooked. I thought about taking the book home but, technically, that would have been bank robbery. Instead, I sat down at the ‘personal banker’ desk and, under the pretence of writing my own lengthy comment, I copied down my favourites.

Many of the comments were sarcastic. Sentences like, ‘This is the best bank I have ever seen in my life,’ and ‘How does Barclays manage to recruit and retain such gifted staff?’ were common place.

As I turned through the pages, the occasional corker jumped from the page:

‘When I opened my account, I was given a £15 HMV voucher. I would have preferred a large sack and a balaclava. I would also like to see the cash point machine lowered by 3 feet. It’s currently too high for ram raiding.’

Others bordered on the surreal:
‘The chain attached to this pen is too sh …..’

Underneath it read, ‘The pen attached to this chain is too sh…. arp. I’m bleeding!’

One customer had written, ‘There’s 12 of us standing here. You need more staff or – more customer feedback books.’

These comments illustrate one of my favourite things about the British public – the contempt that many of us share for the patronising techniques used by large corporations to keep their staff in check.

The final comment read as follows:
‘Attach a pair of pink ears and a curly tail on the roof. Then you’ll be the world’s largest piggy bank.’